ghostsfacer:

ghostsfacer:

just got back from the vet. you guys know what my dumb dog did?

he sprained his tail. from wagging it too hard. this is the stupidest thing.

image

(via thriftyniftyandquiteshifty)

alicemurphys:

duhmayo:

baruchobramowitz:

"Hello Professor,

I am doing my best to make this email sound adult. I have rewritten it sixteen, wait… seventeen, times. I am requesting assistance.

Thank you,
Student”

"Student,

ok

-bill”

yo seriously

(via oh-look-its-julie-andrews)

leenahall:

My aaronconda don’t

image

My aaronconda don’t

image

My aaronconda don’t want none unless you got buns hun

image

(via oh-look-its-julie-andrews)

cynical-bee:

thrashturbate:

I’ll bet you’d look adorable grasping at the sheets on my bed

no matter how many times u compliment me im not making ur bed

(via williamdarcy)

xoheart-on-her-sleeve:

This was my my fave line in this movie omg

(Source: fyeahmovieclub, via oh-look-its-julie-andrews)

h0ldmyliquor:

jdude000:

OH MY GOD

My cousin told me about this b/c Stanley’s lack of fucks is me.

(Source: best-of-memes, via thriftyniftyandquiteshifty)

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

gallifrey-feels:

More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married

It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve

(Source: saltwaterandink, via thriftyniftyandquiteshifty)